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Commentary: 445th AW coincides FOD walk with Earth Week

WRIGHT-PATTERSON AIR FORCE BASE, Ohip -- There are so many commonalities between FOD walks and the rest of the world, it can be staggering at times to consider them all. One of these commonalities is how there are three distinct types of people on planet Earth and there are three distinct types of FOD walkers. All determined by how they return their FOD bags back in the box when finished.

There are "Placers" which lay the bag flat in the box in its most logical static form, accepting that's just the way things are. Then there are the "Folders" which compress the bag into many equidistant parts in order to add complexity and majesty to an already simplistic format. Finally there are the "Rollers" which attempt to roll their bags into tight cylindrical shapes in an attempt to restore the bag to its pre-existing form when it was separated off the master roll.

Appropriately, today (April 28) with respect to Earth Day and Earth Week, a "Roller" discovered the "Golden Bolt" during the FOD walk. Rollers, who demonstrate a propensity to return things back to their original, natural state, are a perfect person-group to partake in FOD Walk. They realize the importance of re-using the FOD bags in order to reduce their carbon footprint, and the benefit of returning FOD back to its natural habitat, the yellow FOD can.

Senior Airman Michael Pressler is the person of interest we speak well of this morning. Before the FOD walk ever commenced, Mike Pressler spent his time focusing on being "Green" and considering his "ROLE" in preserving the C-5A Galaxy aircraft assets of the 445th Airlift Wing. Mike listened to songs in his car this morning by such groups as Green Day and songs like "Green eyed lady" by Sugar Loaf. With a recent speech by Alan Greenspan in the back of his mind, Michael Pressler dialed in his perfect Mantra from an old J. Geils Band song.

"So you start walking over to her house and you get over to her house and you walk over to her door and you start poundin' on her door and you say "Open up the door Honey!"
This is Wooba Gooba with the "GREEN" teeth, let me in!!"

And the rest is history. Congratulations to Michael Pressler and the entire Electric shop for their fine performance on the flight line this morning. Mike, for your fantastic efforts, you will receive a gift certificate to the Bob Evans chain of dining establishments (common gathering spot for like-minded folk who want to save the planet and catch a delicious hot meal all at the same time). You will also receive a certificate of achievement from the friendly people of the Quality Assurance office and the genuine respect and admiration of everyone else in the 445th AW. We are also taking the liberty to give you a new "Soubriquet", fitting to your modus operandi.

So let the rest of today be known as Senior Airman Michael "Green Scene" Pressler Day!!