Commentary: 445th AW member finds Hollywood fortune and fame during FOD walk

  • Published
  • By Tech. Sgt. Russell Leganik
  • 445th Maintenance Group
A profound statement was recently published about the similarities between Dire Straits' brand of "Walk of Life" and the 445th Airlift Wing FOD walk. This week we are all privileged to be a witness to this phenomenon as one of our own within the very ranks of the 445th AW went from being a mild mannered, hard working technician, to the ranks of Hollywood stardom in one fluid, instantaneous motion.

So often in life we hear of ordinary people making the trek to Hollywood and finding fortune and fame. I have a story for all of you about a different kind of fortune and fame. A more important type of fortune. A deeper kind of fame. An achievement that leaves a more lasting imprint on the world than just numbers at a theater's box office. I'm referencing the kind of fortune and fame that finds a potentially damaging demon, saving an engine, making a mission, propitiating s a nation's global influence and solidifying the sovereignty of the American Way and Walk of Life.

Now in keeping with the Hollywood lexicon of success and stardom, here is a true life "Rags to Riches" account and it happened in our own back yard - the flight line.

Come and listen to a story 'bout a man named John
A flight line AGE mechanic doin' the job the best he Kaaaaaan
Then one day he was huntin' for some FOD,
And right before his eyes - well he found the "Golden Tod".
Bolt that is, Golden Bolt - Joy and Glee!
Well the first thing you know, John's a hero everywhere,
AGE kinfolk said, "John's a FOD walk grizzly bear!"
Said "them fuel cell folk shoulda been the ones to see"
But John beat em' to the punch - now the fame belongs to thee.
Thrills that is, chatin' pools; famous FOD czars.

Well now it's time to say congrats to our own John Kohut. And kindly thanks to everyone else for kickin' FOD right in its - its gluteus maximus.

You're all invited back in two weeks to this locality,
To have a heapin' helpin' of what FOD does both night and daily.
Ya'all comes back now - ya hear!!

Congratulations to Mr. John Kohut and the rest of the AGE section for scoring the kill this morning (May 12). For your fantastic efforts, John will receive a gift certificate to a local food chain of eatin' joints where likeminded FOD hunters can git some grub and swap FOD huntin' stories.

John Kohut will also receive a certificate of achievement from the "Down Home Folk" of the 445th Maintenance Group Quality Assurance office and the genuine admiration and respect from the entire 445 AW. Thanks to everyone who took time out of their mornin' to go a FOD huntin' with us. We believe our work this mornin' has temporarily made FOD an endangered species.